Haha. "Du må gætte". Se det er et sjovt indlæg i en vittighed-tråd. Det er sådan det skal være.
Snak
Redigeretsøn 15. mar 2009
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING DUTCH :
1. You can get arrested for growing plants, but not for smoking them.
2. You can make jokes about the Belgians and still drink their beer.
3. a. You can legally kill yourself
b. You can legally be killed
4. You´re exactly like the Germans, except that nobody hates you.
5. You think you are a world power, but everyone else thinks Copenhagen
is your capital.....
6. You get to insult people and defend yourself by saying it´s a
national tradition.
7. You can put your finger in a dyke and it will save your country
8. You live in the most densely populated country in Europe, and still
you´ve never seen your neighbours.
9. If the economy is bad, blame the Germans. If a war is started, blame
the Germans. If you lose your keys, blame the Germans.
10. Bikes are public property. Locks are a challenge.
BR
1. You can get arrested for growing plants, but not for smoking them.
2. You can make jokes about the Belgians and still drink their beer.
3. a. You can legally kill yourself
b. You can legally be killed
4. You´re exactly like the Germans, except that nobody hates you.
5. You think you are a world power, but everyone else thinks Copenhagen
is your capital.....
6. You get to insult people and defend yourself by saying it´s a
national tradition.
7. You can put your finger in a dyke and it will save your country
8. You live in the most densely populated country in Europe, and still
you´ve never seen your neighbours.
9. If the economy is bad, blame the Germans. If a war is started, blame
the Germans. If you lose your keys, blame the Germans.
10. Bikes are public property. Locks are a challenge.
BR
You can\'t be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER.
Frank Zappa
man 16. mar 2009
"TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ITALIAN:
1. In-depth knowledge of bizarre pasta shapes.
2. Unembarrassed to wear fur.
3. No need to worry about tax returns.
4. Glorious military history prior to 400BC.
5. Can wear sunglasses indoors.
6. Political stability.
7. Flexible working hours.
8. Live near the Pope.
9. Can spend hours braiding girlfriend´s armpit hair.
10. Country run by Sicilians. "
What?
1. In-depth knowledge of bizarre pasta shapes.
2. Unembarrassed to wear fur.
3. No need to worry about tax returns.
4. Glorious military history prior to 400BC.
5. Can wear sunglasses indoors.
6. Political stability.
7. Flexible working hours.
8. Live near the Pope.
9. Can spend hours braiding girlfriend´s armpit hair.
10. Country run by Sicilians. "
What?
Redigeretman 16. mar 2009
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING IRISH :
1. Guinness.
2. 18 children because you can´t use contraceptives.
3. You can get into a fight just by marching down someone´s road.
4. Pubs never close.
5. Can use Papal edicts on contraception passed in second Vatican
Council of 1968 to persuade your girlfriend that you can´t have sex
with a condom on.
6. No one can ever remember the night before.
7. Kill people you don´t agree with.
8. Stew.
9. More Guinness.
10. Eating stew and drinking Guinness in an Irish pub at 3 in the
morning after a bout of sectarian violence.
BR
1. Guinness.
2. 18 children because you can´t use contraceptives.
3. You can get into a fight just by marching down someone´s road.
4. Pubs never close.
5. Can use Papal edicts on contraception passed in second Vatican
Council of 1968 to persuade your girlfriend that you can´t have sex
with a condom on.
6. No one can ever remember the night before.
7. Kill people you don´t agree with.
8. Stew.
9. More Guinness.
10. Eating stew and drinking Guinness in an Irish pub at 3 in the
morning after a bout of sectarian violence.
BR
You can\'t be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER.
Frank Zappa
Redigeretons 18. mar 2009
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING SCOTTISH :
1. You ain´t English!
2. You ain´t English!
3. You ain´t English!
4. You ain´t English!
5. You ain´t English!
6. You ain´t English!
7. You ain´t English!
8. You ain´t English!
9. You ain´t English!
10. You ain´t English!
-
1. You ain´t English!
2. You ain´t English!
3. You ain´t English!
4. You ain´t English!
5. You ain´t English!
6. You ain´t English!
7. You ain´t English!
8. You ain´t English!
9. You ain´t English!
10. You ain´t English!
-
You can\'t be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER.
Frank Zappa
Redigerettors 19. mar 2009
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AMERICAN :
1. You can have a woman president without electing her.
2. You can spell color wrong and get away with it.
3. You can call Budweiser beer.
4. You can be a crook and still be president.
5. If you´ve got enough money you can get elected to do anything.
6. If you can breathe you can get a gun.
7. You get to be really obese.
8. You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody
seems to care.
9. You get to call everyone you´ve never met "buddy".
10. You can think you´re the greatest nation on earth.
-
1. You can have a woman president without electing her.
2. You can spell color wrong and get away with it.
3. You can call Budweiser beer.
4. You can be a crook and still be president.
5. If you´ve got enough money you can get elected to do anything.
6. If you can breathe you can get a gun.
7. You get to be really obese.
8. You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody
seems to care.
9. You get to call everyone you´ve never met "buddy".
10. You can think you´re the greatest nation on earth.
-
You can\'t be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER.
Frank Zappa
Redigerettors 19. mar 2009
Young family moved into a house next door to an empty plot.
One day Joe, Steve and a gang of building workers turned up to start building a house.
The young family´s 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and started talking with the workers.
She hung around and eventually the builders, all with hearts of gold, more or less adopted the little girl as a sort of project mascot.
They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had tea and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important. They even gave her, her very own hard hat and gloves.
At the end of the first week they presented her with a pay envelope containing two dollars in 10 cent coins. The little girl took her ´pay´ home to her mother, who suggested that they take the money she had
received to the bank the next day to start a savings account.
When they got to the bank the cashier was tickled pink listening to the little girl telling her about her ´work´ on the building site and the fact she had a ´pay packet´.
´You must have worked very hard to earn all this,´ said the bank cashier.
The little girl proudly replied, ´I worked all last week with the men building a big house.´
´My goodness gracious,´ said the cashier. ´Will you be working on the house again this week, as well?´
The little girl thought for a moment and said... ´I think so. Provided those wankers at Carters deliver the f*cking bricks and it doesn´t piss down with rain .´
BR
One day Joe, Steve and a gang of building workers turned up to start building a house.
The young family´s 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and started talking with the workers.
She hung around and eventually the builders, all with hearts of gold, more or less adopted the little girl as a sort of project mascot.
They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had tea and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important. They even gave her, her very own hard hat and gloves.
At the end of the first week they presented her with a pay envelope containing two dollars in 10 cent coins. The little girl took her ´pay´ home to her mother, who suggested that they take the money she had
received to the bank the next day to start a savings account.
When they got to the bank the cashier was tickled pink listening to the little girl telling her about her ´work´ on the building site and the fact she had a ´pay packet´.
´You must have worked very hard to earn all this,´ said the bank cashier.
The little girl proudly replied, ´I worked all last week with the men building a big house.´
´My goodness gracious,´ said the cashier. ´Will you be working on the house again this week, as well?´
The little girl thought for a moment and said... ´I think so. Provided those wankers at Carters deliver the f*cking bricks and it doesn´t piss down with rain .´
BR
You can\'t be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER.
Frank Zappa
Redigeretfre 20. mar 2009
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING GREEK :
1. You get to shout about your culture although the only real culture
most Greeks have is what is growing between their toes.
2. The police is even more corrupt than the criminals they are
supposed to be chasing.
3. You can blow your nose in the street by pinching it between the
thumb and forefinger and trumpeting forth without everyone around
wretching their stomach contents up at the sight.
4. Old women can sport moustaches.
5. Young women can sport moustaches.
-
6. Men can be hairier than the average grizzly bear and not get put in
a zoo.
7. You get to call the bouzouki a musical instrument when the rest of
the world sees it as an instrument of torture.
8. You are the only nation to have lost its marbles and still wants to
let everyone else around the world know about it.
9. Ridiculous bureaucracy.
10. Nana Mouskouri and Demis Roussos.
1. You get to shout about your culture although the only real culture
most Greeks have is what is growing between their toes.
2. The police is even more corrupt than the criminals they are
supposed to be chasing.
3. You can blow your nose in the street by pinching it between the
thumb and forefinger and trumpeting forth without everyone around
wretching their stomach contents up at the sight.
4. Old women can sport moustaches.
5. Young women can sport moustaches.
-
6. Men can be hairier than the average grizzly bear and not get put in
a zoo.
7. You get to call the bouzouki a musical instrument when the rest of
the world sees it as an instrument of torture.
8. You are the only nation to have lost its marbles and still wants to
let everyone else around the world know about it.
9. Ridiculous bureaucracy.
10. Nana Mouskouri and Demis Roussos.
You can\'t be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER.
Frank Zappa
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